One of the few areas we do disagree is reality television. She likes them because she has a very stressful job and she claims she needs mindless shows to "turn her brain off." I believe reality TV is the downfall of civilization. Every time I nudge her in the ribs about the absurdity and pointlessness of watch other people play out pretend real lives in front of the camera, Amy counters with what she views as just as useless a waste of time on my part - fantasy football.
I can remember in the early-'90s, publications like Street & Smith and Athlon Sports would have advertisements for fantasy football (those ads are still there, by the way). I had no idea what it was or how to play. I was interested, though, and wondered what it was all about. I remember asking my dad if I could get whatever package the ad was selling. It was one of those futile attempts kids know are a futile attempt but ask anyway and then have the nerve to be surprised/hurt when the request is denied. It was not until I had a job with a sports magazine in 1999 and I joined forces with two co-workers to finally enter my first fantasy football league. I believe our team was "Three Amigos." The league was run by a bartender and the draft was held on the deck of the sports bar. This was 1999, before NFL.com was even around, I think, and before Yahoo and ESPN ran Fantasy Football leagues. Everything was by paper. How primitive!
There are few firsts in your life that you will always remember. I have no clue what my first airplane flight was from and to. First song I slow danced to? Zero idea. But the big things - the really important things - you remember the first time. My first fantasy football pick was Brett Favre. It was an incredible and important lesson - don't pick Favre as your fantasy QB. Favre can be an exciting and entertaining player to watch and cheer for, obviously having fun and the wherewithal to underhand flip a pass to a running back when a linebacker is screaming right toward his head, but he also has the tendency to throw a pass into triple coverage and get intercepted when either another receiver is wide open or simply throwing the ball out of bounds is a better choice.
That first foray into fantasy sports was a special time for the 24-year-old me. The Three Amigos overloaded ourselves with stats and analysis of whether the best defense/special teams was a smarter pick than getting a No. 2 tight end. We printed out reams and reams of paper and color-coordinated highlighted our favorite players, using position-by-position lists as well as overall value of the top 300. I probably studied more intently for that first fantasy football draft than for any college final. I certainly prepared myself more rigorously for the draft than for the written portion of my driver's license test (which I, embarrassingly, had to take three times).
There are many theories why fantasy sports are so popular. Some say people want to feel in control. Others say people want to feel smarter than actual general managers getting paid to make player acquisitions. Still others claim it's just a watered-down version of gambling. And yet still others say it let's people have a deeper and broader appreciation of all teams in a league. The validity of such theories may be open to debate, but I think all of those miss the true point of fantasy sports - you are competing against other people for money/prizes/trophies/t-shirts/bragging rights/whatever.
Whether it is an actual touchdown by a wide receiver for your favorite team or a touchdown for your fantasy team, the whole nature of scoring signifies winning and losing, winners and losers. Why else would they keep score if it wasn't about winning and losing?
I remember when I worked as a photographer for ABC news in the Palm Springs area. We would be on location for hours for some stories and could not leave. For those of you who do not know Palm Springs, it is an artificial town in a desert, kinda like Las Vegas, but on a smaller and older scale. To be stuck at one place for hours on end ended up being fairly boring a lot of the time. Even if you are just waiting for the next newscast in 30 minutes, you're only really working about 90 seconds at a time. To pass the time, my reporter and I would start throwing rocks at objects to see who got the closest or who could hit it. A simple contest, sure, but it satisfied my need to pass the time as well as my need to show my athletic prowess (as much as throwing pebbles at a discarded soda can 30 feet away shows anything except people litter).
I do believe there is something innately hardwired in a man's brain to prove his dominance over other men. Men need to know and show they are better than other men. I truly think it is a primal, natural, Darwinian aspect of men to fight, compete, showoff. this is not to say women cannot or do not have the same urges, but I think it is more pronounced in men. And there are plenty of women who are more competitive than men. I can think of a few of my wife's friends who are cutthroat board game opponents.
The same aspect of giving people points adds a whole new dimension to simply watching football. Instead of primarily caring about the San Diego Chargers, I will now watch the Detroit Lions play the Minnesota Vikings to see how the Lions defense/special teams does.
This simple aspect of points very well could change my relationship with my wife. I have stumbled upon Reality TV Fantasy League. I may not have my own team, but at least I now have a way to watch these insufferable shows without rolling my eyes in contempt every 30 seconds. I can now jump off the couch, point to the TV and scream, "Ashley and Constantine had an open-mouth kiss! That's 10 points!"
I'm sure Amy will be thrilled at my new-found past-time.
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